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New Bush Jokes

The most recently added 10 New Bush Jokes. Please rate as many Random Bush Jokes as you feel like.
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Q: What did Osama bin Laden and pantyhose have in common?

A: They both irritate Bush!



"Today President Bush is on a trip to California, but he and Republican Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger went out of their way to avoid each other. Experts say this is bad news for the Republican Party, but great news for the English language."
--Conan O'Brien



Q: Why does President Bush hail from New Haven, Connecticut and Commie Chick Natalie Maines hail from Lubbock, Texas?

A: New Haven had first choice.



"President Bush just announced that next month he will host a White House conference on Malaria. Bush told reporters, 'I'm looking forward to meeting the Malarians.'"
--Conan O'Brien



"President Bush is in Southeast Asia... and because of the metric system over there, his approval rating is actually 62."
--David Letterman



President Bush calls in the Head of the CIA and asks, How come the Jews know everything before we do?"

The CIA chief says, "The Jews have this expression :'Vus titzuch?'

The President says, "Hell, what's that mean?"

Well, Mr. President", replies the CIA chief, "It's a Yiddish expression which roughly translates to "what's happening". They just ask each other and they know everything."

The President decides to personally go undercover to determine if this is true. He gets dressed up as an Orthodox Jew (black hat, beard, long black coat) and is secretly flown in an unmarked plane to New York, picked up in an unmarked car, and dropped off in Brooklyn's most Jewish neighborhood.

Soon a little old man comes shuffling along. The President stops him and whispers, "Vus titzuch?"

The old guy whispers back: "Bush is in Brooklyn."



"At Yale, Bush was president of his fraternity. Few jobs provide more hands-on experience in robbing others of their dignity. In fact, his senior year marked the first time in history Amnesty International intervened in a pledge rush."
--John Oliver



President Bush can't find WMD in Iraq, and can't do anything about gas prices, so he's come out for "Intelligent Design".

I guess that shows that religion, not patriotism, is the last refuge of a politician.



"The Venezuelan President went to the U.N. and called Bush the devil. You could tell Bush was offended, because his tail stopped wagging. Bush said, 'I would love to answer your ridiculous charge that I'm the devil, but I'm a little too busy this week trying to unite my party behind torturing people.'"
---Bill Maher



The Iranian Ambassador to the UN had just finished giving a speech, and walked out into the lobby where he met President Bush.

They shook hands, and as they walked the Iranian said, "You know, I have just one question about what I have seen in America."

President Bush said, "Well, anything I can do to help you, I will."

The Iranian whispered, "My son watches this show called 'Star Trek' and in it there is Chekhov, who is Russian, Scotty, who is Scottish, and Sulu, who is Chinese, but no Arabs. My son is very upset and doesn't understand why there aren't any Iranians on Star Trek."


President Bush laughed, leaned toward the Iranian ambassador, and whispered back, "That's because it takes place in the future."