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New Chuck Norris Jokes

Here are our most recent 15 New Chuck Norris Jokes. Rate some of our Random Chuck Norris Jokes for us and take a look at all of our other categories too!

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Added on Tuesday, April 29th

Chuck Norris could shoot someone and still have time to roundhouse kick him in the face before the bullet hit.

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Added on Wednesday, March 12th

Chuck Norris is 1/8th Cherokee. This has nothing to do with ancestry, the man ate a f*cking Indian.

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Added on Friday, January 11th

Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.

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Added on Thursday, January 10th

Chuck Norris has to use a stunt double when he does crying scenes.

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Added on Thursday, December 6th     Submitted by: HanaBanana

Chuck Norris invented the spoon because killing people with knives was too easy.

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Added on Tuesday, October 16th     Submitted by: Nathan Umandap

When Chuck Norris was born, the doctors had to call the bomb squad

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Added on Monday, October 8th

Chuck Norris has to maintain a concealed weapon license in all 50 states in order to legally wear pants.

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Added on Friday, September 28th

Chuck Norris can sneeze with his eyes open.

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Added on Friday, August 17th     Submitted by: Bill Sizemore

Luke Skywalker uses the Force. The Force uses Chuck Norris.

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Added on Thursday, May 3rd

Chuck Norris can drown a fish.

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Added on Thursday, May 3rd

Chuck Norris once partook in a pissing contest outside of a bar. His opponent drowned.

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Added on Wednesday, April 25th

Some kids piss their name in the snow. Chuck Norris can piss his name into concrete.

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Added on Monday, March 12th

Guns don't kill people Chuck Norris kills people.

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Added on Friday, December 15th

Chuck Norris successfully separated twins conjoined at the head by roundhouse kicking them in the face.

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Added on Wednesday, November 1st

Chuck Norris brushes his teeth with barbed wire.

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