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Top 30 Chuck Norris Facts

Top 30 Chuck Norris Facts based on how YOU rate them.
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Current Rating: 3.94

Chuck Norris counted to infinity - backwards.

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Current Rating: 3.78

Viagra and Cialis are made from Chuck Norris' DNA.

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Current Rating: 3.76

A few guys tried to follow Chuck Norris during a light workout while he was vacationing in Hawaii. It's now called the Ironman Triathlon.

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Current Rating: 3.75

Chuck Norris doesn't breathe, he holds air hostage.

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Current Rating: 3.75

Chuck Norris once shot a 33 on a 36-hole golf course.

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Current Rating: 3.71

The only man Google can't find is Chuck Norris.

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Current Rating: 3.68

Chuck Norris sells his urine...Of course we all know it as Red Bull.

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Current Rating: 3.61

Chuck Norris can stick a CD up his ass and burn data onto it

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Current Rating: 3.6

When Chuck Norris was born, the only person who cried was the doctor. Never slap Chuck Norris.

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Current Rating: 3.6

Chuck Norris doesn't mow his lawn. He doesn't have to. He dares it to grow.

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Current Rating: 3.59

Leading hand sanitizers claim they can kill 99.9% of germs. Chuck Norris can kill 100% of whatever the hell he wants.

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Current Rating: 3.59

Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting implies the probability of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.

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Current Rating: 3.58

Bigfoot often tries to take pictures of Chuck Norris.

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Current Rating: 3.55

The 'Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse' are more accurately: Chuck Norris' right hand, left hand, right foot, and left foot.

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Current Rating: 3.55

Chuck Norris taught the creator of the piano how to play it.

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Current Rating: 3.52

Chuck Norris' dog is trained to pick up its own poop because Chuck Norris doesn't take shit from anyone.

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Current Rating: 3.52

There are now five cup sizes at Starbucks: Short, Tall, Grande, Venti, and Chuck Norris.

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Current Rating: 3.51

Chuck Norris invented the spoon because killing people with knives was too easy.

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Current Rating: 3.5

Death once had a near Chuck Norris experience

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Current Rating: 3.49

Chuck Norris can split the atom. With his bare hands.

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Current Rating: 3.48

There is no 'ctrl' button on Chuck Norris' computer. Chuck Norris is always in control.

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Current Rating: 3.48

Chuck Norris can sit in the shade...in an open field.

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Current Rating: 3.48

Chuck Norris DOESN'T love Raymond.

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Current Rating: 3.47

Elvis never died, he just owes Chuck Norris Money!

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Current Rating: 3.47

If you are stuck on a test and you don't know the answer to a question, write in Chuck Norris. The answer is always Chuck Norris.

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Current Rating: 3.47

Chuck Norris can read lips- with his eyes closed.

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Current Rating: 3.47

The world's fastest car has 7 gears. 5, 6, and Chuck Norris.

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Current Rating: 3.46

Chuck Norris can clog the toilet with his pee.

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Current Rating: 3.45

Chuck Norris carved Mount Rushmore. With his feet.

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Current Rating: 3.45

If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris, you may be only seconds away from death.

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