Saturday, May 7, 2011

Why Ya Gotta Be So Mean

Have you heard Taylor Swift's new song Mean?  You haven't?  Take a gander at the video.  I'll wait.


Okay, back?  I love this song.  Adore it.  I mean who hasn't had someone in their life that is just MEAN.  "Pointing out my flaws like I don't already see them."  Someone who wants to go on and on and on about the bad parts of your personality but never willing to acknowledge they might just be little off too.  And aren't there some people you just want to say this to?

The last few months I've become very clear on a few things.  I'm trying very hard to look inward this year and make myself better.  I've found myself in a few situations that have had me questioning myself, the way I present myself and the way I treat others.  I've definitely been to blame in part or whole in some of the situations.  In others, I have not.  And I'm learning to stand up for myself in a much different way.

I've come to realize that being me and standing up for who I am doesn't need to be a huge production.  It doesn't need to be a loud demonstration.  Well, sometimes it does, but most of the time it doesn't.  Sometimes it is very simply removing yourself from a situation or changing the way you deal with the situation.  Sometimes it is be honest and frank about how the person has hurt you.  And sometimes it is just being quiet and walking away.

But I've also found that sometimes that mean person just needs a little grace.  I don't know their day.  Maybe I came along at just the wrong time.  So learning to stretch myself and forgive a hurt might help us both.  That's the hard lesson.  Learning to forgive the one's you expect to treat you the best.  Because don't we all do it?  Go after our nearest and dearest with our worst behavior sometimes?  If I'm not the perfect friend how can I expect others to be?  I've been forgiven my bad behaviors and sharp tongue, so shouldn't I extend the same?

The lesson for me is learning to apply this all.  Learning to stand up for myself without teaching others that it is okay to treat me badly.  Without being a bully about it.  I think this is so important because I want my son to grow up and see me lead by example.  I want him to see me deal with the mean in a way that inspires him.  I want him to stand up for himself, but know that sometimes that mean person might just need a little grace.



Mean
You, with your words like knives
And swords and weapons that you use against me,
You, have knocked me off my feet again,
Got me feeling like I’m nothing.
You, with your voice like nails on a chalkboard
Calling me out when I’m wounded.
You, pickin’ on the weaker man.

Well you can take me down,
With just one single blow.
But you don’t know, what you don’t know,

Someday, I’ll be living in a big old city,
And all you’re ever gonna be is mean.
Someday, I’ll be big enough so you can’t hit me,
And all you’re ever gonna be is mean.
Why you gotta be so mean?

You, with your switching sides,
And your walk by lies and your humiliation
You, have pointed out my flaws again,
As if I don’t already see them.
I walk with my head down,
Trying to block you out cause I’ll never impress you
I just wanna feel okay again.

I bet you got pushed around,
Somebody made you cold,
But the cycle ends right now,
You can’t lead me down that road,
You don’t know, what you don’t know

Someday, I’ll be, living in a big old city,
And all you’re ever gonna be is mean.
Someday, I’ll be big enough so you can’t hit me,
And all you’re ever gonna be is mean.
Why you gotta be so mean?

And I can see you years from now in a bar,
Talking over a football game,
With that same big loud opinion but,
Nobody’s listening,
Washed up and ranting about the same old bitter things,
Drunk and grumbling on about how I can’t sing.

But all you are is mean,
All you are is mean.
And a liar, and pathetic, and alone in life,
And mean, and mean, and mean, and mean

But someday, I’ll be, living in a big old city,
And all you’re ever gonna be is mean. Yeah,
Someday, I’ll be big enough so you can’t hit me,
And all you’re ever gonna be is mean.
Why you gotta be so ?
Someday, I’ll be, living in a big old city,
And all you’re ever gonna be is mean. Yeah,
Someday, I’ll be big enough so you can’t hit me,
And all you’re ever gonna be is mean.
Why you gotta be so mean?

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