Thursday, February 25, 2010

Can't Tell Up From Down

I'm tired. TIRED. TI-RED.  I'm getting a little taste of being on my own this week.  My hubby and I were fortunate enough that he was able to take a whole month off of work.  But the last three days he has been helping my BIL out and working for him.  On one hand I'm happy to help family and for the extra dinero, but on the other hand, I'M TIRED. 

My boy got a cold at one week old.  I cannot tell you what a bad momma I feel like to have a one week old with a cold.  We took him to the doctor and our pediatrician (whom I LOVE!) calmed our fears and told us just to ride it out.  He is getting better but his little cough kills me!  Shakes his whole little body.  The first two nights he had the cold I could sleep because I was scared to death he was going to stop breathing.  So every single solitary noise he made I was awake.  And now he has gone from being an awesome sleeper to a cat napper during the day.  Let me tell you there isn't much you can get done when your baby only sleep 30 minutes at a time.  My house is a disaster.  Well, that's not totally true.  I keep it picked up but there has been no dusting or cleaning going on.  Which I suppose I probably shouldn't care about but I do.  Especially when people want to come visit.  Which I WANT them and need them to do.  I don't want to seem like a lazy housekeeper!

My hubby has been quite amazing.  We had a bit of a bump but we are figuring out how to help each other figure it all out.  The first day he went to help my BIL, he walked in the door, took a shower and said, "Here give me the baby.  You get out of the house for a bit."  You've never seen anyone get dressed so fast in their life.  Nor have you ever seen someone relish 30 minutes at the store like I did.  And the nights when I didn't get any sleep he will take Jackson and let me go back to bed for a bit.  Thank God for good husbands.

All in all I think we are settling in.  Mommyhood is hard.  I knew it would be but you know how it is.  Knowing something and experiencing it are two totally different things.  I'm just trying not to push myself too hard and let some of my perfectionism go.  Which isn't easy for me.  I've had my breakdowns and my moments of irritation.  But I think I've pulled it together fairly quickly and straightened myself out.  Besides one can't fall apart when one has this butterball to look at all day.


Andrea said...

Praying you will have blessed days and nights and fewer bumps in the road.
Blessings, andrea

Bekah said...

The bumps will keep coming every now and then, but you will just get better and better at dealing with them. From the looks of that handsome fella you are doing great! Sorry to hear about the cold, those are NO fun at all!

Michelle, Queen of Everything said...

I know it is really hard to let go of the perfectionism, but you'll have to. TRUST me, no one is looking at your house when they come to see that cute baby. Just let it go and tell yourself they'll be back at some point in the future when it is cleaner!

And being a mom is totally and completely exhausting. Around six weeks it gets a little easier, and around three months a little more, etc. There are always milestones and each one makes things a little bit better.

I'm sure you are doing GREAT and I can't wait to see that fat baby...dusty house or not! I love you and am so proud of you, momma.

Linzi said...

What a beautiful baby boy! I know exactly how you feel with your little one being sick :( So helpless, right? At one point during a cold my little baby had so much drainage that she began gagging on it and vomiting. That is a mortifying thing to watch a newborn do! It is comforting to know that almost all babies get the occasional cold, and though it is difficult for the mommy to witness, they do get through it and it only makes their immune system stronger!
As for the 30min. cat-naps, my daughter, who is typically a good sleeper, occasionally goes through phases like that. It is exhausting, but hopefully it is just a phase, right? :)
Please do not feel bad about your house! Wow, I can't believe you even keep it so picked up! I did not beginning cleaning my house until my child was 3 months old, lol. Everyone kept telling me to not worry about the house - so I didn't. I did have many loving family members and friends that would stop by to do laundry and a little cleaning. That was nice.
What a wonderful, supportive husband you have! I'm sure you cherish him.
I'm stopping buy from The Secret is in The Sauce to welcome you to the SITSahood! Through SITS you will find a large community of mommies who don't necessarily have it all together, but are having fun on the journey! Thank you for being so honest in your sharing!

Stefanie said...

I can't imagine that it is an easy job to be a mommy. Good luck with mommy-hood, and may you only have special loved days.

~ stopping by from SITS to welcome you to SISTahood

Small Burst said...

I completely understand where you're coming from. Moms to new borns never get enough sleep. And when the little ones get sick, it takes a toll. Hang in there. Glad hubby is helpful. You'll need all the help you can get. Welcome to SITS. We're here for you Sitsah!

Queenie Jeannie said...

Ahhh! What a precious son you have!!! As a Mom of three, I KNOW about the tiredness you're talking about. When he starts sleeping through the night, your world will seem so much brighter - honest!! Do what you can around the house, and then try to just let it go mentally. No one is perfect and your focus should be on your sweet baby, not the dust bunnies! Hugs!

Stopping by from SITS!

Kristi at Spend Less and Save More said...

Here to welcome you to SITS family of bloggers! What a beautiful baby. You are very lucky to have a man that will give you time to yourself to recharge your batteries! We all need that once in a while.

Anonymous said...

Getting out of the house is so necessary. I can't imagine how single moms do it. Your little one is so precious!

I'm stopping by from SITS. Welcome to the group.

Rachel Cotterill said...

Aww, what an amazing adventure that you're just starting out on! He is adorable - and your husband sounds like he's doing a great job.

Dropping in from SITS to welcome you on board :)

carma said...

your son is adorable :-) I've gone from perfectionist almost obsessive cleaner before my son was born to completely lax cleaner (never thought that would happen) - my son is now 14 and I have yet to pick up my regimented cleaning habits.

Enjoy your little one-- much more important than cleaning :D

Welcome to SITS! We're glad you joined...

Erin said...

Oh my goodness, what a beautiful baby! Welcome to motherhood my dear. It is an amazing roller coaster ride with ups, downs, twists, and loop-de-loops. Just take it one day at a time!

Stopping by from SITS.

thatgirlblogs said...

It's all about sleep deprivation. Get as much sleep as you can steal, and if you're breastfeeding, remember to renew yourself with healthy food! Hang in there, he is Gorgeous!

Visiting from SITS

Robyn said...

Oh how I could just snuggle that little boy! Mine is now eight and I remember those days all too well. Well, I say that but the bad parts quickly go away and you just remember the best.

I'm stopping by from SITS to welcome you to the community!

The Grasshoppa:Triplets Plus Two Momma said...

Welcome to SITS and to mommyhood---things will smooth out a little as time goes on!

Your baby is absolutely gorgeous.

Annie said...

Hi, stopping from SITS!!!

I understand you and wish that everything goes well.

Your baby boy is beautiful.

Have a nice week.

Shell said...

Oh, he's precious! Don't worry too much about the house. Anyone who comes to visit is there to see that little peanut and you, not your house.

Stopping in to welcome you to SITS!