Wednesday, February 11, 2009

An Insomiac's Ramblings

I go through these bouts of insomnia. Often it happens when I'm under a lot of stress or worried or unhappy about something. I haven't had an "episode" in quite a while, but this week it strikes again. I find myself SO TIRED yet completely unable to get into bed. I don't know if my insomnia is different than others. I know that if I get in to bed, I will read for about 10 minutes and be out like a light, but I cannot somehow will myself to bed. Even as I sit here my eyes are red, my body is tired, my head is heavy and yet still I can find a million other things to do besides go to bed.

I've always been someone who has loved the night. A night owl is what my parents used to call me. Long after everyone was in bed I would be up reading, listening to music, or whatever. I would also always be the last one to rise. This has never worn off. Even as I've gotten older I still have always loved to stay up late. There is something about the night when the house is quiet. No one to disturb you. You can float around your house doing little things, watch whatever you want on TV, spend HOURS looking at cupcakes or whatever. I just love the solitude of the night.

Tonight my "reasons" for originally staying up a little later were because I am putting together my little Valentine gifts for the fam. Then I decided to do a little decorating. And now I'm on the computer reading the blogs, checking on Facebook and editing pictures. I should be sleeping. I'm going to be sorry for procrastinating my sleep tomorrow.


Dawnita said...

I know you must be tired, but I am so jealous that you get to spend your time baking and blogging. I am up cleaning and doing laundry becaue my little guy won't let me do any of it until he goes to bed at almost 9:00. Enjoy this time because once little kiddos come along it's all over. :)

Girly Muse said...

aw, man. hate nights like that.

i hope today you will have superhuman strength and then can go home and SLEEP!!!!

Michelle, Queen of Everything said...

We're on the same sleep cycle, sister! I've been up for the past week. I finally broke the pattern and went to bed one night even though I felt wide awake and did NOT want to go to bed yet.

But I passed out and got a good night's sleep. I think when I'm anxious, I just want to stay up and try to air out my brain or something. Going to bed when I feel like that is hard. Even though going to bed is the last thing I want to do, it's the one thing that helps.

It's a vicious cycle of anxiety = no sleep = anxiety and so on.

Hope you sort it out soon.

P.S. I LOVE my owl "night life" magnet. It cracks me up every time I look at it.